Being a writer is like being a born-again Christian. Everyday, you have to rededicate yourself to the overall endeavor. Sometimes, especially in the face of temptation and distraction, that rededication takes mountains of faith. So here I am, faithful and rededicated – again. Let’s see how long it lasts.
Writing isn’t the only endeavor that requires rededication, however. Moving abroad hardly ever turns out to be the endless vacation envisioned upon first visiting a place on vacation (try to say that three times quickly in succession). People who seemed proactively amenable to assisting with any need suddenly disappear. Things that were supposed to cost one price end up being double with unannounced taxes factored in. Offices keep strange hours and functionaries take four-hour lunch breaks. The paperwork alone is a bitch. There’s the isolation that comes with local holidays when everything’s closed and everyone’s with their families. There’s the lack of understanding from people who don’t get that just because you live overseas, it doesn’t mean you’re not working a 9-5, or have shitty co-workers, bills, traffic, and overall fatigue to deal with. There’s the anxiety that comes with being unsure if you’ve made “the right” decision – the “right” decisions – since there’s no playbook; you’re the trailblazer, the rebel, so you have no one else to blame if you fuck up.
And that’s when the faith steps in. Faith that I’m not making the “right” decisions, but decisions that were the best I could make at the time and being okay with that. Faith that, through the bureaucracy and hassles, through the isolation and disappointment, through the fear and anxiety, I’m living where I want to live, where I’ve wanted to live, for the longest time. Faith that, in spite of anything and everything that might happen, I’m leading an interesting, extraordinary life. A life nothing short of adventurous.
Be adventurous. And know that it’s never too late to rededicate yourself to any endeavor.
Wow, deep.. I’m very proud of you, you followed your dreams. All the hassles of life occur anywhere you live, just in a different form. I have had two weeks of work drama, and I’m freezing to boot. Keep the faith thirough the storm, the calm is on it’s way!
Amen. You’ve been visited by the holy spirit of this marvelous craft, for sure. See it as a bottomless well you can always dip into and replenish yourself with, whenever you need it. You can call it anytime. It’s always there – in the silence of your room, on the busy sidewalk, in the cab, high above from a window view, on the dancefloor, and in those hushed pauses in between sentences over the phone. Let it envelope you whenever you need it.
Thank you. I needed this. Truly needed this.
This is so true! Very well said.
awesome piece:-)
Well written! Similar doubts or questions crop up for me every so often. And after I let all the doomsday-homeless-bag-lady scenarios run their course, I remind myself that I am where I want to be and need to be, and that I’m going to be just fine if not better in the next phase of the journey.
Thanks so much for the comments and support, guys. It’s heartening to know that folks out there ‘get it,’ especially when you think you’re hacking through the jungle all by yer lonesome.
Abraços,
FB
Bravo !!! words to live by , La Dolce Vita best to you !!
“Faith that I’m not making the “right” decisions, but decisions that were the best I could make at the time and being okay with that.”
Loved this bro!
Wow.
I need that.
Right.
This.
Second.
Muito obrigada!
You truly have a gift with the penstroke bro.
I’ve loved this blog for quite some time, but it’s this post that really resonated. Thanks for the reminder and the direct push to all your readers to “be adventurous.” For me, your message re: faith and adventure couldn’t have been more timely.
Way to go with the renewed enthusiasm brother! Keep that positive attitude man…the universe will conspire to line thing’s up for you! See u in a couple weeks!